So it's been almost five months since I've written anything. Once I got back to school things sort of started spinning out of control. Between loads and loads of boy drama and all of the work I've had for class, I haven't had time to really think about blogging.
And then there's been all of the incredible nation-wide drama and victory (I'm speaking, of course, about Obama's victory in the Presidential election). Up until the polls closed, I had started biting my nails again. But now, thankfully, they're back to being long again. :-)
There's been scandal too: Blago anyone?
But in all of this, I've been thinking mostly about what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. I've had it mostly figured out for a while, but now it's about waiting to hear back from Mr. Maxwell at McLean (as well as volunteering at McLean next semester). I've been volunteering at the OCF in Boston, so it's been interesting to connect with new people and such.
I quit the phonathon, so I've just been working the Bell's Desk. That was enough money until I decided that I needed both a Zipcar (for volunteering at McLean next semester) and a Blackberry (which I obviously don't need at all). Now I'm looking for another job and failing miserably. I had a tutoring position lined up (or so I thought), but I was in NC at the time and the family needed someone for their daughter ASAP, so they went with someone else. The worst part is that they didn't email or call to tell me. I had been back in town for a few days and hadn't heard from them, so I emailed the mother. She responded that she was sorry she hadn't told me earlier, but that things had been "crazy". Gee, thanks.
I've become much closer with everyone who lives on this floor, too, which is nice. I've had my ups and downs with my actual roommates, mostly because we have a full kitchen and sometimes it doesn't get cleaned after use, but it's been a great experience so far. Being part of the solarium group (even if I'm not directly a part of it, technically) has made me realize what's important in life. Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration, but I realize what I've been missing out on. Don't get me wrong, I would love to have a boyfriend, I miss the companionship and the stability (and of course I have someone in mind, don't I always?), but spending so much time with friends has been wonderful. Maybe what I need IS a Harvard boyfriend, despite that's what I've avoided like the plague for years (again, I have someone in mind, haha). That way we could hang out with my friends together and also hang out with our respective friends separately (and his friends together, if he wanted).
Of course, it's not going to matter so much in a few months, after we've all graduated. Everyone always says they'll keep in touch, but does that really ever happen? I was supposed to "keep in touch" with a lot of people after high school, but I never really talk to anyone. Maybe college is different though, because I've lived with these people. I guess we'll find out shortly.
It's hard to believe that I started this blog last year as my New Year's Resolution. I failed miserably halfway through the year in terms of updating the blog regularly, but I succeeded at my real resolution, which was to start over.
I would have never admitted this to myself at the time, but looking back this blog was an effort to distance myself from Eric, even if it was just in the slightest ways. At the time I thought "starting over" was just about not letting things get to me as easily and allowing myself to break through so that I could really "be myself" but now I realize that all along "being myself" was about getting away from Eric and I think part of me knew that when I started the blog. Come to think of it, that's probably why I haven't blogged in so long. It's been almost 8 months since the breakup and sometimes it doesn't even feel like we were ever together. I guess that's a good thing as long as I learn from what happened.
Rehearsals for Vagina Monologues start again tomorrow (I guess some things are better left unchanged), but with all of the work I have to do, I'd really rather not go. Granted, it's only supposed to be an hour, so it shouldn't be too bad. On the way back to the quad I have to go by a couple of libraries and pick up books for my papers, which I really don't want to write.
Speaking of, I'm procrastinating by throwing myself a "fake birthday party" tomorrow night. It's not entirely fake, just early. My birthday is on the 19th, but since that's during finals, no one can ever come. I decided to have it on the 10th this year and a lot of people are going to be able to make it. Let's keep our fingers crossed that it moves smoothly.
That's basically it for now (the yet-to-be-written papers are calling my name), but we'll see if I do a better job of updating this year. :-)
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